… there’s no end to the tears. Alone, with thoughts that I don’t want to be having. Flashes of memories of those times when I was self harming. Wanting so bad to bring that blade across my skin. That line of blood that follows. But doing so would mean putting my marriage at risk. He said he can or is at least willing to try his best to help me cope with my struggles but self harm would be the deal breaker.
So here I am, curled up, unable to stop crying, because my mind is out of control. I’m losing the grip I have and I’m about to fall.