I Will Not “Get Well Soon”

Yes, I’m sick. No, I don’t have the flu.
It affects every part of my body, from my skin to my bones to my joints to the way my brain reacts to each and every task its supposed to do like walk, feed myself, blink and speak. It even affects the thoughts that go through my mind.

There is no cure. This. Is. Forever.

That’s what ‘chronic’ means. I’m not going to ‘get well soon’. This is a life-long thing that I have no choice but to accept.
I will suffer from physical pain, often reaching debilitating levels, on a daily basis. I will feel discomfort all day, every day. My body will do strange things that I didn’t tell it to do.
I will also suffer from the stares, mostly from the people I know. The judgement that comes from family members cuts deep into my heart. Friends abandon me, never taking the time to understand why I am the way that I am.

But this doesn’t mean my life is over. 

I still get to live every day. I choose. Will I get up out of bed today, fight the pain with a fake smile? Or will I choose comfort. Relax and rest according to what my body is telling me it needs. It means that I live differently than most ppl around me.
I struggle but I am FIGHTING.

I will not get well, and it definitely won’t be soon.
But I’ll do what I can with the abilities that I do have because I know that there is someone else out there who has it worse than I do and they are getting by just fine. 

Deep breath.



About Secret Stains

I wanna do something that matters, say something different, something that sets the whole world on it's ear. i wanna do something better with the time I've been given and I wanna try to touch a few hearts in this life to prove I was here. I apologize if I seem absent minded sometimes. Sometimes I forget I'm still awake and say things out loud. Inside I am beginning to burst at the seams. There are so many secrets ... so many scars ... so many stains. This is me. Welcome to my world.
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One Response to I Will Not “Get Well Soon”

  1. krysiakorsak says:

    A brave and courageous post…so very well said and written. I applaud you for your honesty and truth and sheer guts of facing each day and life, head on… Take good care, and hang on in there…and Thank You for making folk like me more aware… 🙂


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