High Functioning Depression


She smiles a big bright smile for the entire world to see—

Contagious with her small teeth, goofy laugh and bright eyes.

On the outside her life looks so put together,

Experiencing things that she has spoken of for years,

Manifested the “perfect” life for her soul.

But when she’s alone, she cries—

She cries for the strength to keep going.

She cries for the aching muscles and bones

that never let her rest.

She cries for the money she isn’t making.

She cries for the emptiness in her heart,

For the emptiness in her womb.

She smiles for the love her family gives her.

She smiles for the beautiful sunrises,

outside her window every morning.

She smiles when Momma Moon’s rays beam into her bedroom,

as she lays bathing in the moonlight.

She smiles for manifesting beautiful dreams into reality.

She smiles because at the end of the day

Because she knows it will get better.

She is your neighbor, your sister, your mother, your wife… She strives to be perfect. She makes sure everyone else is taken care of, before she takes care of herself. She puts her needs to the side to make sure yours are met. She hides behind that big bright smile, But she is dealing, every day, with depression. High-functioning depression— the debilitating mood disorder of depression that is suppressed just enough for one to carry out their daily responsibilities and duties.

My heart goes out to anyone with high functioning depression. While being eaten alive on the inside you are able to function enough to do the daily tasks that need to get done. But when its all done and you are alone, you break.

I break.


About Secret Stains

I wanna do something that matters, say something different, something that sets the whole world on it's ear. i wanna do something better with the time I've been given and I wanna try to touch a few hearts in this life to prove I was here. I apologize if I seem absent minded sometimes. Sometimes I forget I'm still awake and say things out loud. Inside I am beginning to burst at the seams. There are so many secrets ... so many scars ... so many stains. This is me. Welcome to my world.
This entry was posted in Uncategorized and tagged , . Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s